For six year-olds and nostalgic thirty-somethings! - Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith Reviews

Last night, a friend offered to buy me a ticket to a midnight showing of "Star Wars 6" (And yeah, yeah... I know about the episode order -- I just do it that way to irritate you). The idea initially sounded like hell on earth, what with having to deal with fanatics and their silly masks, pretend Darth Vader helmets and plastic lightsabers. I almost said no. But I am not one to pass up a free movie... after all, going to 100+ movies a year gets expensive! This sixth "Star Wars" probably ranks as the third best in the series. The original and its sequel only surpass it. And as hard as it is for me to say, there are many things worthwhile in "Revenge of the Sith" *Lets out a giggle*. I thought the special effects were state of the art in many scenes... although in others I felt that I had seen them all too often before, like the way old cartoons use the same backgrounds repeatedly to cut corners and save effort. But the flight scenes in this film were quite outstandingly done. I felt that the storyline, although predetermined and highly unsurprising, was well paced and had a logical arc. I liked a few of the lines that were clearly inserted by Lucas as a jab at today's American government. I didn't think Lucas was capable of such innuendo. However, the rest of the script was as dismal as we've all come to expect from these kiddie flicks. I was very disappointed to see as many lightsaber duels as we did... the parade of glowstick battles was tiresome. There were also the prerequisite half-dozen cringe inducing moments of utter corniness. I went to a midnight showing with some very devoted fans and even they let out a few embarrassed laughs at unintended times. If you can keep a straight face when Palpatine and Windu face off, or when Darth Vader pulls a Brando and screams "Noooooooooo!!!" to the heavens while punching the air... well, then good for you. No doubt the same will always be true with the fanboys... they will defend this movie, even praise it as one of the best of the year. Why, you ask? The answer is simple... because they want to like it. It doesn't matter what appears on the screen... if it has the words "Star Wars" in the title, they are bound and determined to like it. Sort of like the way Ebert is bound and determined to like Jennifer Lopez or Angelina Jolie movies. "Revenge of the Sith" *Lets out another giggle* is exactly what you expect it to be... it has a little more weight that the previous two dreadful installments. And with that weight comes a better story. The acting is uniformly abysmal... with minor exceptions from Natalie Portman and the CGI Yoda. The script is, well it is a George Lucas script. And the special effects will be special for a year or two before they become out-dated. I will admit to liking the film better that I expected to. It is the best of the recent three. But in the end, it is still corny tripe made for six year-olds and nostalgic thirty-somethings. And if you think you have seen the last "Star Wars" movie... then your picture appears next to the word 'gullible' in the dictionary. Look for Star Wars #'s 7,8 & 9 sometime around 2012-18. I mean, how on earth could George Lucas pass up the opportunity to have Darth Vader do more Burger King commercials???